#everypony fucking hates you meme

[spideyladman]

This is their dynamic right?/J

[rantsaboutponies]

A Trivial Pursuit

In this episode: Remember to watch Trivial Pursuit: America Plays, Monday nights at 9, only on The Hub!

As a massive trivia buff and quiz player, I can tell we’re already going to be getting a lot of things wrong in this episode.

Wow. Okay, no. There is no trivia competition on the PLANET where you’re assigned to a team randomly to “keep things fair”. That would be quite possibly the most idiotic way to do anything, especially since IT’S A COMPETITION! What possible sense would that make?

I think the thing that might annoy me the most about Mudbriar (besides literally everything about him) is the fact that he doesn’t even use the word “technically” correctly. Given his character, that’s utterly nonsensical.

MEME FACE

“Team AppleDash is practically unstoppable!” Hur hur.

I’m not even going to comment on the fact that Granny Smith is clearly reading off cards from a board game and why that would be profoundly stupid for a competition to do.

MOAR MEME FACE

Is Pinkie...the only one who’s allowed to buzz in? Why? Why isn’t Twilight? What on earth is this?

Oh, good. Apparently it’s not enough for Pinkie to ruin everything for everypony; now Twilight has to do that, too.

ALL THE MEME FACE

Still no. Trivia competitions aren’t about letting all players on the team have an equal chance at answering questions; it’s whoever knows it rings in and answers it. That’s literally the entire point. Plus, given that Pinkie has gotten every answer she’s actually said wrong, keeping her from ringing in is certainly not a bad idea. (Also, this is why trivia competitions don’t assign teams randomly BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE FUCKING STUPID.)

And now Twilight can ring in, too. She just...didn’t before...because...

So now...Twilight’s plan is to disqualify just Pinkie...even though all prior disqualifications have been entire teams...because that’s how competitions work... Are they paying any attention to what they’re doing?

NO. You cannot combine teams, especially if the players have been disqualified! Absolutely not! Is there any aspect of this competition that isn’t moronic?

Maybe if you guys would ring in with the bell when you grab it with your magic instead of just grabbing it and not ringing in, you might actually be able to answer.

“TwiPie forever?” “I don’t know.” Yeah, I’m with you there.

Seriously? Are they just going to give answers they know are wrong because they’re just “having fun” now? I can tell you from experience that, if you actually do that in real life, you will get your asses kicked. Everyone HATES people who do that.

Wait, what? That’s it? We don’t even get to find out what happens? Holy crap, fuck this episode.

Episode score: Lose. This was about as bad as that episode of The Big Bang Theory where they did their own version of the MIT Mystery Hunt, except it was super obvious that the writers had no clue what that actually was, so they just wrote a scavenger hunt instead.

Season score (W-L-T): 1-3-12.

[princess-of-the-corner]

 I heard about new mlp episodes and I have several questions. 

First off, did we really just get a bunch of new characters dumped in? We just ended the last series with dumping in several new characters. Not to mention they made the Movie Canon(but not EQG for some reason!), which also has a ton of new characters. Okay, I guess the celebrity voice cast isn’t a maintainable option, but they could do something. I know Hasbro has to get it’s toy sales, but come on guys. I think you have plenty you can work with, in both toys and characters to make stories for. 

Continuing on, is this new set going to be new main characters? You can’t just introduce a new, large group like this and have them tag along on every episode. Either it’ll go back to the original cast and everyone goes ‘uh, what about the new guys?’, or you focus on the new ones and let the old ones fade back into the secondary cast. Which, I mean, at that point why not do some kind of full reboot or even just a timeskip?

I also have several problems with the story in general. It’s been a problem for a while now, but this episode made it pretty blatant of “all the non-ponies don’t know about Friendship! None of them have friends, so they’re all jackasses!”. Which is, to be blatant, pretty fucking impossible. They don’t have friends? Not even just ‘oh, our inter-species relationships are bad’, but legit they don’t have friends even within their home country? 

How- How do they function as a society? You can’t love without some kind of friendship, you can’t have a healthy family without some form of friendship. What I’m saying is that, as presented, the population of these countries should be the most fucked up assholes possible, if they hadn’t already killed eachother off!

I don’t even get what they’re trying to do there? You can introduce characters, and even have them be going through a Friendship Problem, without saying ‘they know nothing about friendship at all’. You even could’ve had this episode without that plot point! I mean, if Ponies, who ‘already know about friendship, unlike everyone else’, can still go to Friendship School, why not other creatures know Friendship but strive to learn more about it?

That said, if you’re going to dump characters on us, can we have a Crystal Pony character? You have an entire Empire of them, yet they’re only backup background Ponies. Do any of them have names we heard on-screen and not from looking in the credits/merchandising? Also more Zebras! We still haven’t seen any other than Zecora! Or Diamond Dogs! Or Buffalo! Or the Cats and Parrots from the movie! Or Minotaurs! Or other Sirens! Holy fuck I just realized how many sapient races they shoved in this show. My point still stands though. Y’all should’ve developed any of these before you tossed in Yaks. 

Side note, ‘Everycreature’? Look, ‘Everypony’ was already pointless since everyone/everybody works just fine. Why not just switch to those words? 

However, I feel like the biggest problem is the original cast in this episode. 

The other five usually would’ve been more assertive when they saw how downhill it was going. And, like, when Twilight was all depressed, they were converted to their most basic of character traits to try and cheer her up, even though they all know better! Rainbow: “get the fuck up!”, AJ: “Eating apples makes me feel better!”, Fluttershy: “Here, hug a bunny!”, Rarity: “I bet a pretty dress would cheer you up!”, Pinkie: “Party Time!”. Again, these characters know better by now, and have been legitimately helpful and comforting, and also call each other out on things! 

Instead, we get Starlight doing the ‘tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear’ bit. Which, okay, I like Starlight well enough. I kind of want to rewrite her first villain episodes(I have a long rant on how the first ones went far to make her a villain, but had her turn around in a mater of seconds), but she’s been doing good and progressing well enough. Even so, Starlight is not the one who should’ve done this for several reasons. Partly because the rest of the cast should’ve done that. 

And then we have Celestia. Like... okay. Celestia’s ‘uselessness’ in major situations before were explainable. It used to be that she was disconnected from the Elements of Harmony, so she couldn’t use them to save the day. Then it was the dangers either overpowering her or getting the jump on her(Sometimes both.). The second excuse was weak, but hey, if you want Twilight and crew to beat the villain, you need to have them take out the sort-of-goddess so she doesn’t go in guns, er, horn blazing. 

But this episode could’ve showed Celestia off as a Leader, as Princess! When everything goes sideways and all the other leaders are bickering all to hell, she could’ve been the one to smack some sense into them! That is literally part of her job description! Diplomacy! Just have her go “Okay guys, I know you’re pissed. How about we put aside the fight to find the missing students? Then you can talk it out with them.”. But no, she just sits back and tells Twilight to do it. Fucking hell! Who thought old ass memes of characterization would come true!

Also, back to new characters, I have concerns over that villain pony. I forgot his name, but I’m calling him “Dr. Dracula Strange”. My concern isn’t over his potential villainy in the future. Oh no. However, remember that thing I said about Starlight’s time as a villain? How they spent their time making her the worst, most irredeemable pony and then shoved a ‘tragic backstory’ in and had her change her mind in three seconds? I’m scared that they’re going to pull that with this racist fuck. Partly because of story, but also partly because the racism angle hits a bit closer to reality compared to “Unicorn accidentally starts a cult, and then causes timeline fuckery”, so I say let’s just toss the guy in a cell with Tirek and not go the redemption arc route with this one. And that’s coming from me, who loves redemption arcs! You need to give a character redeemable traits if you want them to become a good guy. 

Another thing! It’s not really a complaint but, seriously? “Not even a princess can do whatever she likes when it comes to shaping young pony minds.”. Er, I hate to break it to y’all, but that’s kind of the definition of what she can do! Celestia is the Immortal leader of the country and the one making the laws. If she wanted to, she could make laws on anything. Of course, you do need to draw the line before going full tyrant, but still. Tia’s got a bit more power in this situation. 

TBH, I’m very glad that I already decided that my universe/fanart/fanfics are officially Canon Divergent as of a while ago.